


Maggie MacCart>^ Listens 
at the Door 

AN IRISH MONOLOGUE 



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BY 

MARY MONCURE PARKER 





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The Dramatic Publishing Company 



BRADLEY-OES 




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^^^^SJ0^^m'il^^:^^^^^^:^^^^^^^^^^c(^^^^ 



Practical Instructions for 
Private Theatricals 

By W. D, EMERSON 

Author of *'A Country Bomance/' <'The Unknown Eival," 
^'HuiBble Pie,'' etc. 



Price, 25 cents 



Here is a practical hand-took, describing in detail all the 
accessories, properties, scenes and apparatus necessary for an 
amateur production. In addition to the descriptions in words, 
everything is clearly shown in the numerous pictures, more 
than one hundred being inserted in the book. No such useful 
book has ever been offered to the amateur players of any 
country. 

CONTENTS 

Chapter I. Introductory Eemarks. 

Chapter II. Stage, How to Make, etc. In drawing-rooms 
or parlors, with sliding or hinged doors. In a single large 
room. The Curtain j how to attach it, and raise it, etc. 

Chapter III. Arrangement of Scenery. How to hang it. 
Drapery, tormentors, wings, borders, drops. 

Chapter IV. Box Scenes. Center door pieces, plain wings, 
door winge, return pieces, etc. 

Chapter V. How to Light the Stage. Oil, gas and electric 
light. Footlights, Sidelights, Eeflectors. How to darken the 
stage, etc. 

Chapter VI. Stage Effects. Wind, Rain, Thunder, Break* 
ing Glass, Falling Buildings, Snow, Water, Waves, Cascades, 
Passing Trains, Lightning, Chimes, Sound of Hors*-'" Hoofs, 
Shots. 

Chapter VII. Scene Painting. 

Chapter VIII. A Word to the Property Man. 

Chapter IX. To the Stage Manager. 

Chapter X. The Business Manager. 

Address Orders to 
THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANIT ( 

CHICAGO. ILLINOIS 



Maggie MacCarty Listens 
at the Door 

AN IRISH MONOLOGUE 



BY 

MARY MONCURE PARKER 



Copyright, 1913, by The Dramatic Publishing Company 



CHICAGO 
THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 






THP'Sb-OafeBSO 



'CI,D 33405 



Maggie MacCarty Listens at the Door 

AN IRISH MONOLOGUE 
By jMary Moncure Parker 

Slmre this was how it happened, Biddy Gilhooly — ■ 
an' though 'twas sorry I was to hear thim fussin' — him 
an' her — yet 'twas dyin' hiughin' I was listenin' at the 
other side of the shwing dure. 

I hov nothin' agin this place, as you know, Mary 
'Sullivan — barrin' one or two inconvanienees — some- 
times they takes a strake of hovin' too mooeh company 
— but I soon shovrs 'em by me haughty manner whin 
I've hod enough. 

Make yersilves comfortable, girls — the fokes is home 
tonight an' is usin' the parlor thimsilves— so we'll hov 
to stay in the kitchen. Well, as I was sayin', this place 
is all right enough — the blaster is a nice sort of a mon 
an' minds his. own bisuess an' seems stiddy enough — 
barrin' he's out till one or two onct or twict a wake — 
but thot's shure not my affair and I think he do pinance 
— fer I hear her chewin' the rag ivery toime he cooms 
in late. 

Well, this is how it was — I got it all patched together 
listenin' bechume courses, whin they was atin' dinner. 
It sames she says to him in the mornin ', says she, ' ' This 
is a holiday today--an' fwhot air ye goin' to do?" 

''Oh — I don't know," says he, "meet some of the 
byes I guess." 



4 MAGGIE MacCARTY LISTENS 

*'An' play poker all afternoon — an' lose money an' 
I want a lot of new clothes," says she. ''Now Fred," 
says she, "don't do thot — I'll tell ye what — it's our 
club day an' I've asked ye so often an' the other wim- 
men's husbands go sometimes wid 'em an' — " 

"Not on yer loife," says he. "Fwhat do I want to 
git mixed up wid a lot of tabby-cats for?" 

*'Well, ye needn't call 'em tabby-cats," says she. 
"An' they're better than thim rid-faeed, bald-headed 
old min ye play cards wid," says she. "You ought to 
improve yer moind," she says. 

"To the Divvle wid my moind," he says. "Is thot 
what ye 're doin' on the gad all day?" 

An' thru fer him it is, Biddy Gilhooly, she's off on 
the gad all day — as soon as I gits her waist hooked up 
the back in the marnin', off she goes on the hoof loike 
mad — an' if it's improvin' her moind she is shure thin 
her brain ought to be bustin' thru by this toime — 
but I ain't sayin' but fwhot she's a plisant spoken lady 
at thot. 

Well, they wint on sparrin' back an' fourt an' finally 
to git rid of her tazin' he agrees to go, an' off they 
goes to her club — she all ragged out in vilvet an' plumes 
an' he in a Prince Albert an' silk hat an' a face on him 
loike vinegar. They was gone about two hours, him 
coomin' home first — she stayin' to some extry meetin' 
or other an' whin I heard him shlam the front dure 
thin I knew how it was widdout aven hearin' him shwear 
to himsilf while he was changin' his clothes — an' shure, 
girls, it is looky it is he didn't know Frinch or Eyetalian 
or any other language or he wouldn't been thru swear- 
in' yit. Shure, I see 'twas goin' to be a chilly meal whin 
they sot down to dinner. For some toime they didn't 
spake, thin she busts out wid — 



MAGGIE MacCARTY LISTENS 5 

**I niver was so mortified in my loife," says she. 

' ' I hope yer satisfied, ' ' says he, floppin ' his pork chop 
down hard on his plate. ''Niver agin fer me!" 

"Indade, and I'll not ask j^e," says she, ''but ye 
moight have been a gintleman," she says, beginnin' 
to cry. 

"Now don't go blubberin'," says he, "or I won't 
talk at all. An' why wan't I a gintlemin?" says he. 

"I s'pose because ye don't know how to be wan," she 
says, firin' up. "In the first place didn't ye go to slape 
and shnore right out loud?" 

"An' who wouldn't wid such a subject? — 'The Inner 
Ego in Relation to the Outer World.' — A foine thing 
to spind an hour talkin' aboot?" 

Shure, Biddy Gilhooly, I came near bustin' right out 
laughin' behint the sliwing dure. 

"Ye ought to know about the Inner Ego," says she, 
"ye 're chock full of it," she says — "but thot ain't the 
worst — whin I woke ye up wid a punch onct or twict — 
thin ye turned and twisted about loike a child an' 
finally, to cap it all, ye said to Miss Martha Briggs, who 
sat next to ye, 'I'd loike to shmoke a cigarette,' wouldn't 

ye?" 

"Well, fwhot's the matter wid the ould girl — can't 
she take a joke?" says he. 

"Ould Girl — don't spake so disrespectful," says she. 
"An' beside ye put yere foot in it foine — ]\Iiss Briggs 
is the head of the Anti-Cigarette movement in our 
Reform Department. But thot ain't all," she says, an' 
she was workin' her jaw so 'she couldn't sthop to ate — ■ 
but just thin she sthopped a minute whin I brought in 
some hot biscuits — for the appetite of him wint on the 
same. "The worst," says she, continuin' whin the 
shwing dure closes an' I got up close to it agin, "The 



jg MAGGIE MacCAETY LISTENS 

worst," she says, "was whin we wint to serve the tay 
and wafers and coffee, and Mrs. Sthanly asked fwhot 
would ye hov — thni fwhot did ye say — 'a rye high-ball' 
. — says you — thot's fwhot ye said — 'a rye high-ball' — I 
could hov dropped thru the flure. ' ' 

''I forgot f where I was," says he, "whin she says, 
* fwhot will ye hov'? — just loike thot — so familiar." 

"Do ye know who she is?" says she. "The Prisidint 
of the Wimmen's Christian Timperince Union — ye've 
made a foine mess of it. Thin whin the chairman of the 
Art Departmint says to you, 'Air ye fond of Titian?' 
says she — thin fwhot did ye say — 'I always take siltzer 
water in mine,' says you — Fwhot will she think of me 
wid a husband loike thot? Thin I steered ye off to the 
leader of our music class, thinkin' ye moight not dis- 
grace me so mooch on music — an' I hope to die if it 
wasn't worse — she says to you — 'IIov ye heard Pag- 
liacci?' — an' how did ye answer? 'I don't care for 
thim Eyetalians,' says ye — 'but I loike Eddy Foy.' 

"An' thin fwhot did ye say to ould JMrs. Billings 
aboot her niece? — 'Thot's a cute little thrick in white,' 
says ye — an' she glared an' says — 'Sir, thot's not a 
playin' card — thot's my niece.' 

"Lord knows the aunt was homely enough to sthop a 
clock — an' how did I know she hod such a pritty rila- 
tive? If ye hod a bunch loike tliot at yer club I'd go 
ivery wake," says he. 

"Ye 're an' ould booby — talkin' so silly," says she. 
"An' it's no more I'll ask ye to the club." 

' ' An ' it 's no more I '11 go, ' ' says he, ' ' Ye can bet your 
boots on thot — I Avas the only mon there." 

"Indade ye wan't," says she. "There was Professor 
Grote — a very brilliant mon." 

"Professor Goat, ye mane," says he. "Shure hQ 



MAGGIE MacCAETY LISTENS 7 

looked loike wan wid tliiiu gray alfalfas on his chin." 
''Don't spake disrespectful of your betters," she says. 
''An' if there was a night school — ye could learn a few 
things from him." 

"Shure an' if I took him out for a night or two I 
could tache him a few things," says he. 

"But not in the line of mintal improvemint," says 
she — an' thin she flounced up an' I bate such a quick 
retrate, Mary 'Sullivan, thot I batted me head agin 
the pantry dure. I'm thinkin', Biddy, me darlin', thot 
whin the ]\Iaster goes to the Missus' club agin — Purga- 
tory will be a place to wear your furs. An' now we'll 
hov our coffee. I hov some foine crame — knowin' ye 
was coomin' I gave the fam'ly the top of the milk 
bottle this marnin' and saved the crame for oursilves. 



JUN 2 1913 



The Outcast^s Daughter t g-^Acts 

By MARION EDDY PRICE, 25 CENTS 

Ten male, five female and one child characters. Plays two and 
one-half hours. Modern costumes. Three interior, one exterior 
scenes, all easily arranged where there is any scenery at hand. No 
stronger melodrama has been given the play-loving public. Full of 
the strongest appealing heart interest, intense, pathetic, real life, 
where joy and laughter are mingled with pathos and suffering, but 
all ending happily. A melodrama without a villain or the use of 
firearms. Amateurs may play it successfully, it plays itself, and 
it is adapted to strong repertoire companies, 

CAST OF CHARACTERS 

Carl Faber An ex-convict 

Howard Ross A manufacturer 

Dennis Hogan Servant to Ros.s 

Abel Gardener to Ross 

Judge Havens Of the police court 

Recorder Of the police court 

Lettner Clerk of police court 

Second Court Clerk Clerk of police court 

Two policemen 

Little Hugo Agatha's child 

Agatha Sterne Ross' bookkeeper 

Ida Rheinhold A retired singer 

Mrs. Wilmuth A washerwoman 

Katie Factory girl 

Frances Factory girl 

SYNOPSIS OF SCENES 

Act 1. Ross' private ofTice. "What has given me the honor of 
this visit?" "I will never sing again. My life has been a sad 
failure." "Good God! My mother!" "I have done wrong, I confess, 
but when a mother asks, a child must forgive. Oh, Mr. Ross, help 
me." "You, my rich and famous mother, to you I was nothing, 
and you — you are nothing — nothing to me," "Agatha! Agatha! 
My child! My child!" 

Act 2. Agatha's attic. "My poor father. So young and strong. 
How I could have loved him." "Yes, Katie is right, I have nothing 
but bread for my sweet child." "Madam, I vould lie if I say she 
vas anything but a lady." "On the other side, towards the garden, 
there are a few rooms I have never used. If you will take 
thorn " "You do not look like a man who could commit mur- 
der. How was it?" "I was a weak man and many misfortunes 
made me desperate." "My picture! I must be mad." "You are 
good, child, but you shall not call me father." "Father! Father!" 

Act 3. Ross' Garden, "He is so good to me, but I cannot forget 
my poor unhappy father." "The picture was taken when I was 
young. He shall have it." "Stay here and be my wife." "That 
suspicious old man is in the garden." "For her I sacrificed every- 
thing." "Do you want to go to prison again?" "My father needs 
me to defend and comfort him." 

Act 4. A Police Court. "Do not ask me, your honor — I am an 
«!X-convict." "Your silence will not help you." "It vas dark und 
Mrs. Steme vas that scared she vas faint." "I hope, sor, yer honor 
believes in a future life, sor." "He wished to see his child; I am 
his child." "Grandfather, we love you." "I am his wife. Do not 
condemn him." 

Address Orders to 

THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 

CHICAGO, OJLINOB 



Hageman^s Make-Up Book 

By MAURICE HAGEMAN 

Price, 25 cents 

1 le importance of an effective make-up is becoming more appar* 
ent to the professional actor every year, but hitherto there has been 
no book on the subject describing tlie modern methods and at the 
same time covering all branches of the art. This want has now 
been filled. Mr. Hageman has had an experience of twenty years 
as actor and stage-manager, and his well-known literary ability has 
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any other. It is absolutely indispensable to every ambitious actor 

CONTENTS 

Chapter I. General Remarks. 

Chanter II. Grease-Paints, their origin, components and use. 

CHiapter III. The Make-up Box. Grease-Paints. Mirrors, Face 
Powder and Puff, Exora Cream, Rouge. Liquid Color, Grenadine, 
Blue for the Eyelids, Brilliantine for the Hair, Nose Putty, Wig 
Paste, Mascaro, Crape Hair, Spirit Gum. Scissors, Artists' Stomps, 
Cold Cream, Cocoa Butter, Recipes for Cold Cream. 

Chapter IV. Preliminaries before Making up; the Straight Make- 
up and how to remove it. 

Chapter V. Remarks to Ladies. Liquid Creams, Rouge, Lips, 
Eyebrows, Eyelashes, Character Roles, Jewelry, Removing Make-up. 

Chapter VI. Juveniles. Straight Juvenile Make-up, Society 
Men, Young Men in 111 Health, with Red Wigs, Rococo Make-up, 
Hands, Wrists, Cheeks, etc. 

Chapter VII. Adults, Middle Aged and Old Men. Ordinary Type 
of Manhood, Lining Colors, Wrinkles, Rouge, Sickly and Healthy 
Old Age, Ruddy Complexions. 

Chapter VIII. Comedy and Character Make-ups. Comedy Ef- 
fects, Wigs. Beards, Eyebrows. Noses. Lips, Pallor of Death. 

Chapter IX. The Human Features. The Mouth and Lips, the 
Eyes and Eyelids, «ie Nose, the Chin, the Ear, the Teeth. 

Chapter X. Other Exposed Parts of the Human Anatomy. 

Chapter XJ. Wigs, Beards, Moustaches, and Eyebrows. Choosing 
a Wig, Powdering the Hair, Dimensions for Wigs, Wig Bands, Bald 
Wigs, Ladies' Wigs, Beards on Wire, on Gauze, Crape Hair, Wool, 
Beards for Tramps, Moustaches, Eyebrows. 

Chapter XII. Distinctive and Traditional Characteristics. North 
American Indians, New England Farmers^ Hoosiers. Southerners, 
Politicians, Cowboys, Minors, Quakers. Tidmps, Creoles, Mulattoes, 
Quadroons, Octoroons, Negroes. Soldiers during War, Soldiers dur- 
ing Peace, Scouts, Pathfinders, Puiitans. Eaviy Dutch Settlers, 
Englishmen, Scotchmen, Irishmen, Frenchmen. Italians, Spaniards, 
Portuguese, South Americans, Scandinavians. Germans, Hollanders. 
Hungarians, Gipsies, Russians, Turks, Arabs. Moors. Caffirs, Abys- 
sinians, Hindoos, Malays, Chinese, Japanese, Clowns and Statuary, 
He*""''ws, Drunkards, Lunatics, Idiots, Misers, RogueE. 

Address Orders to 
THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 

rHTCAGO, ILLINOl.S 



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And Entertainment Books. 

^HJEING the largest theatrical booksellers in 
^^ the United States, we keep in stock the most 
complete and best assorted lines of plays and en- 
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We can supply any play or book pub- 
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description of each play, giving number of char- 
acters, time of plajang, scenery, costumes, etc 
This catalogue will be sent free on application. 

The plays described are suitable for ama- 
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ested in dramatic books should examine our cat- 
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We also carry a full line of grease paints, 
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